Ironically, the only thing that seems to cut us off from authentic and constructive leadership behaviour is our thoughts and beliefs around needing to protect ourselves from others, be significant and therefore to be separate from them.
If we believe that we are separate from people, need to demonstrate our own significance and we need to protect our selves from others then we will adopt thinking and behaviour that is defensive – either passive or aggressive, or worse, both. With this belief, over time, we become less and less constructive and less and less authentic.
The less constructive and the less authentic we become the more problems we encounter. The more problems we encounter the stronger our belief about needing to be separate becomes.
This is a hard cycle to change and requires constant work.